I pray for you
restoration and peace
wholeness and depth
sovereignty and longevity
liberty and liberation
joy and justice
growth and gain
resilience and perseverance
discernment and distinction
patience and progress
balance and foundation
goodness and calm abiding
healing and strength
wisdom and compassion
light and weightlessness
empowerment and enlightenment
air and water
wind and earth
sun and moon
necessity and nourishment
humility and honor
grace and gratitude
providence and provision
love and life
faith and fortune
warmth and safety
house and home
being and bounty
Om Mani Padme Hum
I Love You World
I Love Its Creatures
I Love You People
I Love Your Differences
I Love You Self
and All You Are Becoming
Spirit
Seeing Too Much
I hate that I see everyone more than they see themselves
gifted a curse,
how much lonelier could I get?
if you’re stuck in your mind
you’ll always be blind
but I see through Stevie’s Eyes
only energy and vibes
Road Trip
you see me
but you don’t see me
you hear me
but you don’t hear me
you feel me
but you feel fear more
you know
but you run from what that could mean
drowned out by past experiences
packed in your trunk
traveling too far into your future
luggage, that was meant to prepare and propel
you forward
not slow you down
nor halt your progress
although you may need extra gas
for the extended stays and misdirections
but still you so much more
as you rode by
the scenery promising more perspectives
and views to behold
hmm…
what I’m saying is
you see, hear, and feel deeper than anyone I’ve known
with a familiarity specifically designed…
for me,
let me tell it
you’re already above anything I’ve encountered,
or experienced
but still,
the same result persists
you’re so different,
even that doesn’t do you justice
buy you’re still the same
and I’m still the variable left
feeling so different
because
everyone is the same
not because they aren’t unique
but
because you all choose the same road
even in your different paths
and though we all must come to a crossing
where we meet-
our paths intersecting
as we progress through life,
and then you’re gone
at least in the way I first envisioned you
but in my rearview
all I can think is
wherever you are heading
I take solace
knowing you are still moving forward
the best way you know
and all I can do,
however far,
or close
is
admire your drive
though I am the only one on ‘this’ Road
thinking to myself
“Why didn’t you just spin-off
and join everyone else?
I must be tripping…”
Curiosity Killed The…
I act as if you aren’t there
but we both know you aren’t
you can’t handle being ignored
and you let me know about it every time I try
truthfully
you’ve been there longer than anyone ever has
and ever will be
even in my quiet and loneness
holding onto me closely,
as I dream of a world without you
I could admire your presence
and scribe it as divinely ominous
but I won’t!
only God should have that power
the truth is
you’re too jealous and clingy!
you can never let go!
you’ve never even given me a second to myself-
a day of seeing if I could find my way without you
as if I’m no one without you!
what an ego!
and and and…you know what else?!
to tell the truth!
I hate that we have to coexist together!
you’re always there, yet you aren’t
we never speak
I feel you, and you feel like nothing!
yet your damn forceful ass hands never leave me be
gripping, clawing, clutching, pulling at me
and I’m not your punching bag
why do you get to go unchecked huh?!
what makes you so special?!
you put me down!
you don’t hold me down, you pull me down!
you don’t just bring me down to earth,
you keep me down on earth!
and even beneath it!
you hate my rise and cause my plummet!
and if I jump, you pull
if I walk, you contain me
if I fall, you speed my decent
sadist!
you attack my resilience, and fight my resistance
enslaving me to your desires!
you don’t compliment me, you dominate me!
what kind of relationship is this?!
you stress me
aging me, pulling at my flesh
you weigh upon my spin and joints, until I hunch and hobble
you’re too heavy to bear
oh and did I say we never speak?!…yea, not even a sooound!
heh
you ride ’til I die
and yet I bare it all, all of you!
how could I ever love you?!
you force your way upon me, invading my whole existence
and yet I live with you daily
never even challenging as much as I should
submissive to your will
because this has always been one-sided
and you like it that way
I’m your company, misery!
and you’re my schadenfreude!
no matter how creative I’ve gotten in escaping your clutches-
fleeing the fate you desire most for me-
you always had a way,
of bringing me right back to you
and without a choice, I embrace you
the trap that you are
not even knowing how to exist without you
Stockholm I surmise
since birth, you’ve always been there
like a guardian angel or my fatal attraction
I grew into your knowledge
now I age in your understanding
and decay to your wisdom
I can’t live without you
and I hate that I have to live with you
but where would I be, if there was no you
where would I be headed?
I guess you know that answer don’t you?
anywhere but down
and anywhere but straight/somewhere
my direction would be lost
whatever free will I had in that choosing
I guess…I’d be lost without you…Gravity
I need you more than you need me
and the earth knows it
and worst of all,
you know it
but just for one day
juuuust one day
I’d love to know how it would feel…
you know, ..without you
could I ever survive splitting up with you?
and even if I knew how to find both the strength and wisdom to part ways…
dare I tempt fate and defy you?
after all, curiosity might kill the…
but I’ve died more than 9 lives just today
and I can’t wait to see what tomorrow holds
I’ve misjudged you
you’ve only ever been opportunity
opportunity to live
and I will remain as curious as any cat
therefore, I leap!
Theorizing Sex
I wonder
are asexual organisms lonely?
do they look at the companionship,
shared amongst their peers as,
unnecessary, overbearing, and invasive
or enticing, enthralling?
Do they look and wonder?
or desire their own energy and self sufficiency?
Deciding time shared, is time wasted
and company,
being only distraction of purpose?
Is their understanding,
and motivation so heightened
that they evolved speedily,
as to not waste time courting
basking in their independence
autonomy, and self control?
or
Are they still evolving?
What is a man
or woman
without sex?
Is that all we are,
repressed or ravenous carnivores?
Disconnected from deeper processes that fuel life?
What is sexuality
if not coupled with
sensuality and spirituality?
carnal, carnivorous
delighting solely in the consumption of flesh
the hunting and devouring of surface
depriving what’s inner most of satiation,
but, what then and what next?
instead of sexuality
being the frame of a picture
we have made it solely,
‘thee’ picture
‘thee’ focus
straining to see more
why has disconnection,
become connection?
connectedly-disconnected
but isn’t that the glory of humanity?
its depth and ability to join
on levels deeper and more vast than
surface?
we lie in a state of hypersexuality
with no balancing base
we are either too ravenous
or too repressed
seeing sexuality as a threat
or a debt
I haven’t had sex for near a decade
but that was the problem
I tried, “having” sex
an act of possession
passive control so-to-speak
which blinded me from the treasures of
offering and surrendering
maybe that’s what the asexual creatures got tired of
feeling too obligated
or too taken from
with no real partnership in return
doing the work
while the partial benefits being reaped
were one sided
until it said, enough
refusing any and all advances
and requests
like the hen,
whom asked for help to make it’s bread
withstanding every objection
fueling it’s self empowerment
realizing,
it can both,
do the work
and deny the requests
and still feel fulfilled
the hen didn’t need anybody
the pain only came from the inherited belief that it did
but once that dependency was shook
her independence,
became the envy and allure of all
coveting what they could no longer have
in her, and in self
deprivation becoming prison
a survivable one
one that fosters both,
reflection
and appreciation
and denial,
becoming the crucible of pheromones
the desire to have what one can’t
making the object of desire,
that much more alluring and maddening
because it was a power,
they could no longer possess
a thing, they could no longer ‘have’
it had become free from the prison of shallow desires
and that new power,
her new power,
inherited a deeper knowing
an intimate oneness with purpose and self
becoming so explosive
that sexuality, evolved into asexuality
but us complex organisms
must still be missing the point
sexuality isn’t a definition
its a function of partnership
yet we engage in it as separates
as dominates and the dominated
as stronger and the weaker
as conqueror and the conquered
but what if we were asexual all along
and evolved into sexual beings
by our power of creation
thoughts, words, and actions
all three being creators of spirit
and sex
being the manifestation of creation of sensuality
the sounds we ignore
the touch we misdirect
the feel we callous
the sight we look through
the scent unknown
and the taste we crave
all being shallow
I was
and still am at times
shallow
but since sex is a topic too taboo
and it breeds a decisive consciousness
for how we see and go about self in a secular world
what hope can a prisoner leaving prison
have to better understand relationship
companionship
partnership
and independence as a choice
not a survival skill
if the thing on most people’s minds
remains the elephant not dealt with
because sex is fear
sex will be prison
and we will all exist as captives to it
in one way
or another
and maybe the asexual organism
perceived this,
then deferred being complexed by convolutions
and just stayed,
simple
in that way,
it evolved
while still,
we revolve shallowly
remaining surface
and I can only hope
that when the inevitable moment comes again
I will be worthy
treating it with its due deference
because if I could change the way I view sex
how much more could I change
in this world
as a man
and in my ‘self’
I believe life would now know no limits
what was once repressed or overly ravenous
is now rapturous
all we need is sound sensuality and spirituality
so sexuality
won’t rule reality
but liberate it
Emotional Wisdom
tears turned crystal
I cry jewels
read ’em and reap
or die fools