Love

Hey Lauren,

Thank you for your concern, your genuine reaction and heartfelt connection are always appreciated.
Even the guilt and shame you seem to always express, I get it, it’s selflessness and needed to personally identify with the pain of those who don’t look like us, but you are one of those who need not feel this way, because you try to understand, and for that, I am so thankful.

Thankful you don’t try and act as if you know, nor force words that you may not have altogether
it’s annoying when I hear so many expressing opinions to what they are not studied on and only telling the narrative of their own emotional prejudice and bias, unbeknownst to their selves of course.

so dig…

those who don’t know, will do what they do
because it’s all they know
those who know a bit won’t do enough
because they don’t know enough to do anything more
and those who know
either impose themselves on those who don’t
or empower those who don’t
and the pendulum swings,
as the energy depicts progress and it’s process

when we struggle for identity
all we can do is react emotionally
not realizing that the emotion has no solution
it only proposes an opportunity to recognize something is wrong
if we live in the emotion of what’s wrong
evading culpability and discomfort
than we are doing just as we are programmed to do
by those who know
and yet impose themselves on those who don’t
because the emotion becomes the bait
controlling what one can and does imagine

those who don’t know
and don’t know enough
are prisoners of the moment
many moments separated
so separated that they can’t see in the moment that it is the same moment to come
because no solution has been found
and to stay in the emotion is prison, so those who don’t know evade the emotion prematurely for self-preservation without realizing a solution
because to care, is a full-time job

and it doesn’t matter who you are and how much you know
it’s not hard to be sick of being sick and tired
and that’s by design

don’t worry for my being by whatever truth you need to share
I’m free even if I’m not out in August
truth, real truth, has no preference nor condition
it just is
I’m not in a prison of fear, nor would I want anyone to imprison themselves by fearing for me
I want your truth just as much as I want to share mine and realize more

as a reaction to the hate crime and cowardly mass shooting of black people in buffalo, I called a rally together on the yard, white, black, brown, etc, and spoke and performed a spoken word piece, I spoke of history, truth, love, what oneness is and means, where separation and racism came and comes from, how hate is embedded and fed upon, how we are puppeteered by our emotions, conditions, classes, colors and illusions of separation and incomplete education, and how we as prisoners have an opportunity to contribute to change and to walk courageously in truth etc.

racial remarks and presumptions were whispered outside, but it amassed 30ish people out of short notice, and people came to me asking me if IMA do it every Sunday, I finally said yes, I’m going to try and get some money so I can at the least buy pops for everyone that comes, I’m doing it again this Sunday
but the message last time was, I don’t fear losing my final for staff wanting to see this as something else, we each have something we claim we’ll die for and therefore live for, mine is no longer a hood but truth, my sons have to grow in this world, so yes I want to go home but I am my name and my message and a father, those are not separate things, and so I will speak and do what my soul calls me to do without fear

I cried given the spoken word peace, I was angry the previous day, but I turned those emotions into something, no white fragility, no white man nor his system nor structure can imprison any aspect of me but my body, I live on by what I give, in that I receive it all the same and it passes on and never dies
this is the energy of my ancestors, the ancestors of us all, their energies is what fuel us to be-to learn adapt grow and evolve- from what was into what will be

courage will never again be my lacking
nor fear my undoing and foundation
when I saw that, a call was imprinted upon me with an even deeper realization than I knew before, and I am alive for such a time as this…as we all are

my music, poetry and opinion mean nothing if I can’t stand in the oven and wait for the coast to be clear, I can’t wait on white people to save me, nor a perfect circumstance to benefit me, my time is now and always will be, but I do people and the message a disservice I am not as equally ready to spread and share truth and awaken white people as I am my own, because change doesn’t come from just reaching look-a-likes, but those whose ignorance does the most damage by unifying us at the core/essence of our being

being comfortable being uncomfortable is the new comfort, change happens at that crossroads, because courage lives there
as I spoke that day and in my piece, I know great white people, and I also know great people, you fit both those categories, the limited one and the limitless one, thank you for your being, energy, and heart
I love you
and thank
I am constantly becoming
because of sacred souls and gigantic spirits such as yours
you are the Moon
and I am but a tide in the waves of your heartfelt energy
the empathy you exude is the envy of angels and god’s alike
and I hope to emit but a portion of it as I continue to grow into who I am
Man Father Son King god-I Am
WayOfLife