Love

I’m your experiment
ingesting your placebos
your punching bag
absorbing ever blow
your pinata
waiting for you to break me
don’t feel guilty,
its OK, I let you do it
we both knew no better

If you love me
just know
that I haven’t learned how to love myself yet
but I’m overly enthused about the opportunity
of being loved by someone else
more than I am worried about trying to learn
something that just seems too impossible
and not as important
when I can have someone like you do it for me

Besides,
what’s self love
when you can behold
someone else’s love
is that not more powerful
plus, you don’t know me like I know me
otherwise you wouldn’t want to know me
and I barely even know me
but I know you
you love me…or what you know
I don’t know if I can fully love you
if I don’t love me
though I love that you love me
but I just thought you should know
so, now you know…me

She looks at me
hoping I’ll change my mind
but I’m imprisoned
she’s chasing time
I’ve stopped wasting time
Her fears, the same as mine
but she goes out of her way
and I stay in mine
I’m flawed, tried being the best I could be
but she wants more, she wants better…it’s praying time
she ACTS, as if she isn’t hurt
when I say my lines
so guilty conscience
AND shame, is mine
love changed her life
but love,
couldn’t save her time

Scream when you fall
but on the way down
scream out why you fell
was it a free fall
or
were you pushed,
was it because of me
or
was it you,
was it in love
or
was it from pain
just make sure you let me know
so what ever the reason,
it wasn’t in vain