I opened the door to misery
inhaling the aroma of a different intimate chemistry
Incremental shifts of synergy individually renders me mentally weak!
A sinister invisible energy creeps!…
Within the darkest crevices of my neurons
that splinters then surrenders my memory to obscenities and beyond!
Reminiscing the scene of her screamin
Incoherent, I ran to the vicinity to discover the reason
what I saw literally uncoiled my double helix
My identity compromised by feelings enhanced by treason
at that moment I!…
and that’s all I remember officer, why would I lie?…
Inside
Chemistry
I thought I was over you
yet again I lied to myself
and let you get the best of me-
I grabbed you quick
helpless in my grip
as I squeeze you by the neck recklessly-
I was numb to how you might feel
my eyes blazed in that moment
dilated with impulse-
so consumed in anguish
I drank every bit of your being
a cold rush down my throat-
instant gratification every time
I lift you up and throw you down
my favorite color brown-
I willingly drown in you, message in a bottle
the taste of sweet misery..
but I love our chemistry-
Holding onto my sanity
I’m holding onto my sanity like a flying trapeze
sometimes I lose grip with reality, shy, I’m trying to grieve
Living feels so suffocating, it’s like I’m dying to breathe
I can’t tell a dream from a nightmare, but feel more alive while I sleep
drifting to the soothing sounds of a hooting owl, that’s inside of a tree
my window stays cracked open, because inside I feel outside of what’s free
these moments…I close my eyes and vibe with the breeze
though, lonely it seems, when I spend the bulk of those nights on my knees
the thunder is calling, lightning igniting the skies
the air, thick with moisture, serenated by the whistling wind chimes
a nocturnal ambiance, likened to the lightest dark
a universal mood set, morbid-like romanticism, the theme of my dying heart
…I pray my shadow never leaves me, my instinct never wilts
my 6th sense never haunts me, my self-esteem never spills
my heart never tricked, my conscience never lies
my voice never hoarse, my eyes never cry
my knees never quake, my shoulders never fold
my temper never simmers, my skin never cold
my sons forever love, their minds never tainted
they see life as art, and thrive within their parts in the painting (goodbye)
Fool Moon
I’m a fool within the lunar and..
I see the moon inside you
I may just howl inside you..(ahhrooooh!)
if there is room inside you
guide me to the womb inside you
I become unglued inside you
subdued, then become brand new inside you
I might just jump the broom inside you
may morph into a groom inside you (I do)
I am cocooned inside you
any moment I may bloom inside you
I may stay long enough to meet my doom inside you
but it won’t come too soon inside you
I change along with the moon cycles that cycle inside you
so be aware of the werewolf, that can not survive in spite being inside you
Been through it
I been through the system, symptoms
Been opened my eyes mom and dad was missing, mission
I try to talk to the world but the world won’t listen, vision
When I close my eyes more prayers and wishing
And then I open my eyes, nay Sayers and critics
New places of living, I never prayed for forgiveness
I couldn’t take to religion, too many pages were missing
I worried more about my stomach aches, not my faith that was missing
No help, they ain’t fit to live in the world that I live in
I guess it’s safe to say they stayed in denial from distance
No peers on the side of the aisle when I was on trial as a misfit
Dad dead, mom in prison
Separated from siblings
I hold my head up and wonder if God is listening
Then ask him why I feel pain
So much trauma in my life now I don’t feel pain
I don’t feel sane..I been through this system
Inside Out
I’m tryna live inside out my means
I woke up inside a dream
Whispers inside a scream
Trying to find “me” inside of team
Giving while there’s nothing left
Living inside of death
Trying to find the “why’s” inside my ex
Finding more inside of less
I’m living inside out my means
I’m an accomplished contradiction is what that means