Chemistry

I thought I was over you
yet again I lied to myself
and let you get the best of me-
I grabbed you quick
helpless in my grip
as I squeeze you by the neck recklessly-
I was numb to how you might feel
my eyes blazed in that moment
dilated with impulse-
so consumed in anguish
I drank every bit of your being
a cold rush down my throat-
instant gratification every time
I lift you up and throw you down
my favorite color brown-
I willingly drown in you, message in a bottle
the taste of sweet misery..
but I love our chemistry-