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Prose of a Con

Poetry and Prose by Russell Wardlow

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Culture

So smart I’m Stupid

November 2, 2020 by Russell Wardlow Leave a Comment

Too smart for my own good

too smart to do no good

but too smart is no good

the judge said,

I was ‘too smart’ before he BANGED the wood!

sentencing me as, “too smart, for good”

Filed Under: Culture, Inside

Uneven Measure

November 2, 2020 by Russell Wardlow Leave a Comment

I have a question

why when our public servants make mistakes

they are able to plea for forgiveness and vow change

and time and time again

despite broken promises

they are given the same chances

when they are critically judged in the court of public opinion

or even in the court of law

there’s always a cry of mercy duly granted

yet when people like me mess up

well our positions are shown

because there is no mercy

there is no chance of forgiveness

nor an ear to hear our vows for change

there’s only vitriol and mercilessness

no one appears on news channels protesting our charge and court mistreatment

or scrutinizing the public and legal system for the due process we get handed down

…just a thought

Filed Under: Culture, Inside, Mercy

Better if I Say it

November 1, 2020 by Russell Wardlow Leave a Comment

Gotta get used to talking about myself if I want the world to know me

eh mhm, speaking for myself-

I’m a real raw deep and a passionate individual, strong dedicated with a destination but just not sure exactly what direction and avenues that are definite.

I guess I’m just used to paving my own paths, but I’m not confident that the world will allow that once I come back to it after the past I came from.

Im kinda sarcastic goofy and witty, spontaneous, funny, but poetic.

I don’t like selling myself because I’m used to speaking others up, deflecting my lack of self confidence that has followed me like a shadow my whole life, even at moments now.

Words are great, but can be thin and manipulating, if not just misleading, so I’m more of an experience.

I live in moments, in the action, not the prelude, though I like suspense, I’m more apt to change the ending with anything but normal twists and turns, because I like being audacious and daring.

Pressing buttons and comforts is exciting.

I like authenticity, and wish people can just roll of vibes instead of over thinking feelings, that way I dont feel too weird by not adhering to social norms that only serve to repress than flourish our ability to connect naturally. I’ve turned this dark moment into light, so I can see my way out on the other side, I just prefer someone there to meet me.

We’ll see.

I’m more me than I’ve ever been now, even though I’m in prison, I’m Free!

Ironic I know.

I do miss meeting new faces…free faces, and connecting with women most, uh, what’s a man without them?

Not much, I figured that much out myself but regardless of my situation I won’t settle or put up, that led to too many problems in my yesterdays, what’s lessons if not learned from?

I’m not one to hide or deny my affection.

I mean at the core we all just want to feel like somebody feels us right? Wanting someone to take leaps and chase passion with, embracing difference and making each moment mean something.

That’s why instead of just writing poetry, I want to create it with not only the world, but someone willing to spend a few moments with me, and learn my truth, and share theirs, because life is art, and each moment is poetic, so hopefully you’ll see the beauty in reading this, and get the feeling that I’m just like you.

Memories can either start with a hi or a bye, I’ve had enough bye’s over the years to never forget what it feels like, so I wanna experience something different, I want more Hi’s and highs in my life

I’ve been spoken for by so many titles and past actions, that speaking for myself is almost strange.

Maybe someone will like or at least accept my spoken word, I mean, what’s a story or writing without the author’s voice?

Filed Under: Culture, Inside, Love, Spirit

No middle

November 1, 2020 by Russell Wardlow Leave a Comment

I only feel when I’m threatened or stressed

I have to go thru something to feel something

to feel valuable

when nothing happens, I feel dead

but everything I react to intensely

as if it’s life or death

I have no medium

in traumatized people

we have hyperactive amygdalas

which may dull our prefrontal cortex

so I have less filter…

all I am, is the moment at hand

either up or down

full of extreme changes

and this is the only explanation you’ll get,

that makes any sense

I’m always either one of two extremes

Filed Under: Culture, Inside, Love, Trauma

Psychos Therapy

November 1, 2020 by Russell Wardlow Leave a Comment

Psychotherapists should look to set up in prisons

if they really wanna make a difference

unless they weigh potential success

versus inheriting a subject’s duress

Prison’s mental health is offering meds

creating more addictions just to take off the edge

never fixing what society wanted changed

never fixing the traumatic anxiety in our brains

made to accept normalcy within our chains

even a psychotherapist would understand that that’s deranged

Filed Under: Culture, Inside, Trauma

Cultural Wardlow

November 1, 2020 by Russell Wardlow Leave a Comment

I’m a cultural war

I’m a culture at war

I’m a casualty of war

I’m a casualty at war

I’m a cultural casualty

I’m a casualty of culture

My casualty is war

My culture is war

with casualties in my wake and before

I was a counter cultural Wardlow

losing many battles…but never the War-dlow

I will be what I am

as I am

because a Wardlow,

is who I am

R.I.P. William Henry Wardlow aka Omaha Shorty, Shorty Wardlow

better known as, MY GrandPa- the name pride and absolute best of us

Filed Under: Culture, Love, Spirit

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Prose of a Con

Prose of a Con is a collection of Russell Wardlow’s prose and poetry written entirely behind bars. Through writings on family, spirituality, freedom, love, justice, redemption, and vulnerability, Russell seeks to show the humanity and hope of individuals like himself who are incarcerated.

Read More

  • Whose Mind is it Anyway June 30, 2022
  • Objects June 30, 2022
  • Same Thang, Different Name June 30, 2022
  • Optical Ill-lusions June 30, 2022
  • Hollow Symbols June 30, 2022

Themes

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