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Prose of a Con

Poetry and Prose by Russell Wardlow

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Hmm, We’re Just a Couple of Lost People Loving

April 4, 2022 by Russell Wardlow Leave a Comment

there is a beauty and art, as well as a needed and natural lesson in falling senselessly in love, during which through time, a sense will be made of it, so it isn’t built and founded upon the same senselessness which first captured it

this is the childlike imagination stage of abstracts developing into mature constructs a concretes which act as foundations and pillars that give form and structure to the infinite idea of love

so yes, at first, when falling madly in love, it is easy because of past failures, to have wise and logical assertions for how to love and why you love, like saying, a person should add to one’s happiness and not be the sole reason

to this I say, when we speak of a temporal kingdom, there are so many reservoirs of happiness, and primarily one can be the reason or source of one’s happiness, it is but an aspect of a growing tree, the branch is not the whole of a tree, but it takes time for the branch to realize that there are more branches and parts than he

in time, more things will appear and cause awareness and further development, through the infinite well of love, and all it offers and teachers

but first, the imagination must first be captured by love, and then love becomes the teacher and shows the madly in love person, that this is but an aspect on an ever-growing tree, and it is only an additive, for there is something deeper at the foundation of this feeling, and the only way to realize it is through the act of falling in love
whether that be with an idea, person, belief, pursuit, or ability

then one can finally say, after they allowed themselves the free feeling of free-falling or this indiscriminate craze of allure, I have grown and understand that which I have and that which I am

this is but an expression of an ominous presence called love to which I get to experience my own and that of another’s

so to continue forth in this sense of senselessness will be my senseless ending and undoing

I desire to not be a blind madman, but one with sight, now that I allowed myself to seek and see

had I not allowed myself this pleasure, I’d have not given myself the opportunity for its lesson

in an aspect of life dealing with intimacy, you are what makes me happy, it is one of the many aspects of my life which I enjoy more than most others, so it takes up a lot of space

but it is not the aspect of life to which I know nor live as my identity, it is just an expression of my identity, it is a thick branch on a tree of me

so I had to lose myself in this love, to lose my sense of selfishness all the while finding myself in a sense of selflessness because of this love

now when I say I love you, I can say it from a point of knowing not only you, but myself, therefore it is a word of affirmation for us both, being expressed externally to you from a point found once willfully and willingly dived in within us

I lost myself to, and in love, to find us both, as individuals or whole-parts, together in the greatest physical expression of oneness and unity, a couple

and you and I, we’ve found ourselves, because at first
we were just a couple of lost people loving

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Prose of a Con

Prose of a Con is a collection of Russell Wardlow’s prose and poetry written entirely behind bars. Through writings on family, spirituality, freedom, love, justice, redemption, and vulnerability, Russell seeks to show the humanity and hope of individuals like himself who are incarcerated.

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