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Prose of a Con

Poetry and Prose by Russell Wardlow

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Just a Dream? (song by WayOfLife)

April 5, 2021 by Russell Wardlow Leave a Comment

I
dreamed
I,
could-n’t
move
last
night,
I was
trapped
in my
mind,
I think
love
is a
lie

I
dreamed
I,
had ran
out
of
time,
I was
lost,
I was
blind,
some-times
I
ra-ther
die

somethings you can’t guess
like when is your last breath
gotta live in the moment and don’t leave nothing left
‘cuz when everyone leaves you-
it feels like there’s nothing left,
feels like there’s nothing else!

yea, it feels like there’s nothing else huh?!
can’t no body help ya!
swallow all ya spit and feel it fizz, like seltzer
time will leave its marks-
count the seconds or the welts huh?!
love will let you starve-
while you beg for more helpings
but everybody selfish
misery love company but company get jealous
whisper to my shadows..
“everything you see,
keep between you and me,
‘cuz its only you and me
I’m as lonely as can be”
when I sleep is when I’m free
when I dream is when I’m me
when I think I gotta blink
you won’t believe the things I see
you won’t believe me I can see, this life is prison somebody plz set me free!

I
dreamed
I,
had a
drink
last
night,
swal-lowed
all
in-side,
just-to
feel
a-live,

I
dreamed
I,
could-n’t
move
last
night,
I was
trapped
in my
mind,
I think
love
is a
lie

I
dreamed
I,
had ran
out
of
time,
I was
lost,
I was
blind,
some-times
I
ra-ther
die

I
dreamed
I,
held a
gun
last
night
aimed it
at
my
mind,
then flew
to
the
sky

somethings you can’t guess
like when is your last breath
gotta live in the moment and don’t leave nothing left
cuz when everyone leaves you,
it feels like there’s nothing left
feels like there’s nothing else!

I’m feeling like I’m broken
but all yaw fail notice
I’m feeling like a number
I’m feeling like quota
I’m feeling like a lease
I’m feeling like a loaner
not feeling like a owner
put down like a coaster
and everything ain’t kosher
I’m feeling like a roamer
I rather be a loner
my feelings getting colder
some feelings in a coma
the rest of them just coded
and I can’t get no closure!

I
dreamed
I,
had ran
out
of
time,
I was
lost,
I was
blind,
some-times
I
ra-ther
die

I
dreamed
I,
held a
gun
last
night
aimed it
at
my
heart
then flew
to
the
sky
bang!

Filed Under: Trauma

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Prose of a Con

Prose of a Con is a collection of Russell Wardlow’s prose and poetry written entirely behind bars. Through writings on family, spirituality, freedom, love, justice, redemption, and vulnerability, Russell seeks to show the humanity and hope of individuals like himself who are incarcerated.

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