So Disrespectful

the problem with social consciousness…
the rebuttals
my homie said,
you know what’s coming next after this black lives matter moment is over
I said, nuh uhn, what?
he posed, what’s the most disrespectful thing you can say when someone is talking to you?
I responded, I don’t know, umm… what you gunna do bout it?
he laughed his answer, “ok…you done?”
as if to say, “next” disrespectful, feigning disregard and lack of care
almost as if the moments in the light was to pacify a child
and I laughed, knowing it’s so true, but said, “they better not!”
it won’t be said clearly like that, but that is what they’ll be saying
because the powers that be understand that its not who laughs first
but in this case, it’s different
because they laughed first and as far as they are concerned
will have the last laugh
this is why some black people are in denial ignorantly hopeful and optimistic,
as to assuage more defeat and demoralization
and counter to that
this is why some black people are just realistically pessimistic, understanding a deeper truth that most rather live in oblivious denial or conscious acceptance of
as to continue the comfort in the reality they choose to accept
and this is what causes impulsive fury and rage amongst this other half of black people
while others on the outside looking in, nab at their tactics and justify a process of civility which has not been allotted to those that suffer in acquiesced submission and enforced and forced upon silence
they see how the world works
and it’s never be in their favor
so they do with what they have, per the options they have
making something from nothing
sometimes by high spirited resilience and ingenuity
and at other times
by an infuriatingly tired and hopeless any means necessary attempt at survival
righting the many wrongs that not only plagued their ancestors
but also their daily life,
stripping any chance at innocence and independence
that should be the promise of each human soul growing into adulthood
as far as they are concerned,
that choice was made for them before they were born
and so the choices they make often is a matter of life or death
so when it comes to perception with the choices they finally make,
to speak as a matter of fact,
they could give a fuck
because deep down they know, beyond appearances
most don’t give a fuck
and the powers that be, definitely give no fucks
oh and if you are confused by my use of the powers that be
and would like to know who I am referring to
well then you are more lost than them
and ignorance must be such an enjoyable ignorance
I know people that would kill to be afforded that ignorance-
and the privilege, potential, and perceptions that come along with