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Prose of a Con

Poetry and Prose by Russell Wardlow

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Titanic

December 6, 2019 by Russell Wardlow Leave a Comment

Let’s take a chance on this titanic

even tho its a sinking ship, I’m a hopeless romantic

plus we shouldn’t over think our possible ending, let’s be organic

its to our benefit to see things better than they appear, we’ll add to this vantage, for our own advantage

I call a few times, she doesn’t answer

shh, voices, Russell don’t panic

maybe she sleepin

and doesn’t see it

quick, come up with a dozen reasons

to try and ignore that my stomach is seizing

self consciousness is so misleading

calm your thoughts, control your breathing

on this brisk summer evening

amongst the sun and the breezes

although the weather feels to fair to wonder if someone is cheating

let go of that heart that u wear under ur sleeve and leave it to the seamstress

maybe she’ll message me later, or maybe not…plucking petals

love comes with a dozen levels

those moments u call out, and u aren’t heard but hear a hundred echoes

there goes those voices, they’re far from helpful

let go

or, should I voice my thoughts

but at what cost

not all honesty is truth

so the way some things come across

may accelerate the loss

ugh

I’m at a loss

what do I do

trying to play it cool

may only prolong me feeling like a fool …

in the end

damn it I thought I said we shouldn’t over think our possible ending

but fears come to light when you live in the shadow of foreshadowing

I try to weather my own forecast that forms forks in the road

consuming half-hearted whichever direction I take

errrrr

press the brakes

shit!

too late

gulp that sour pride with the sugarry brim that blinds the truth for the moment until you

swallow hard, divorcing the responsibility of when men mess up because we still call it a miss-take

she was just out of signal, out of range

that text was confirmed sent the same time you couldn’t cancel the one that you sent

reading while wishing you weren’t lucid

feeling so stupid

when we embrace self doubt, thoughts can turn maleficent

the whole time you were assuming, she was thinking of you and had been trying to get ahold of you ever since

the time stamp you read guiltily is her innocent evidence

yea, she took a chance on that titanic

she just didn’t know that the ship would be sunken by a hopeless romantic

she said goodbye, jack!

Filed Under: Culture, Love, Spirit, Trauma

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Prose of a Con

Prose of a Con is a collection of Russell Wardlow’s prose and poetry written entirely behind bars. Through writings on family, spirituality, freedom, love, justice, redemption, and vulnerability, Russell seeks to show the humanity and hope of individuals like himself who are incarcerated.

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